How to change your child’s undesirable behaviors

How can you change your child’s temper tantrums, angry outbursts, and other undesirable behaviors? You should understand what drives these behaviors before considering how to change. Biological factors such as hunger or tiredness can contribute to this. Emotional reasons such as an inability to cope with or express their feelings. Their environmental factors can affect their activities also.

Rewarded behaviors are more likely to continue, and punished or ignored behaviors are less likely to continue. Consistency in your response to a behavior is significant because rewarding and punishing the same behavior at different times confuses your child. Compass clinical services will help you to understand the importance of a reward system and punishment.

There are two ways to change your child’s behavior

  • Stop the behavior, either by ignoring or by punishing it.
  • Reinforce learning new behavior by rewarding your child.

Time –out method

A time-out method is a form of punishment. Choose which behaviors will result in a time-out (usually tantrums, or aggressive behavior). Choose a time-out location that is both unattractive and non-frightening for the child, such as a chair, corner, or playpen. When the unacceptable behavior occurs, remind the child that the behavior is unacceptable and that if the behavior does not stop, you will place him or her in time-out. Maintain a calm attitude and avoid appearing angry. If your child continues to disobey, take him or her to the time-out area calmly.

  • Set a timer to alert your child when time out is finished
  • Time out should be brief (usually 1 minute per year of age) and start as early as the child has relaxed a bit.
  • You should present within sight of the child
  • Don’t talk to him or her.
  • If the child leaves the time-out area, quietly return to the area and consider resetting the timer.
  • Allow the child to exit the time-out location after the timer has finished.
  • Don’t talk about the negative behavior; instead, think about how you might reward and encourage positive behavior afterward.

Reward system

The Reward system is one way to encourage good behavior in children.  This is most effective in children over the age of two. Working on it can take up to two months. Parents can benefit from patience and keeping a behavior record. Choose one or two behaviors that you want to modify (for example, bedtime habits, tooth brushing, or picking up toys). Find a reward that your child will enjoy. An extra bedtime story, a half-hour delay in sleep, a favorite snack, or, for older children, earning points toward a special toy, permission, or a little amount of money are all acceptable rewards. To the child, explain the desired behavior and the reward. For example, ”If you brush your teeth immediately after you wake up, I’ll give you an extra 10 minutes of playtime,”   This strategy aids in the avoidance of power clashes between you and your child.

  • Good Marks/Bad Marks – provide good marks when you see desirable behaviors in the child. Give your child a reward after a particular number of marks. You can also make negative marks whenever you see an undesirable behavior. Give your child a reward only if the number of positive marks is more than the number of negative marks.
  • Beat the clock – Make a timer. Your child will be rewarded if the task is completed before the timer rings. To determine the amount of time to offer the child, determine his or her “best time” for the task and add 5 minutes.
  • Developing Quiet Time – For a brief time, ask your child to play silently alone or with a sibling (maybe 30 minutes). Watch on your child periodically (every 2 to 5 minutes, according to the child’s age) and reward or token them for every few minutes of quiet or healthy play. Gradually extend the intervals (from 5 to 30 minutes), but continue to encourage your child for being quiet or playing properly throughout each time period.
  • The Good Behavior Game– Make a brief list of good behaviors on a chart and put a star next to each one when you observe it. Give your child a reward after he or she has achieved a certain number of stars (depending on the age).

To stop bad behavior, parents may choose to adopt physical punishment. The most significant disadvantage of this strategy is that, while the punishment temporarily stops the undesirable behavior, it does not teach your child to modify his or her behavior. Physical punishment loses its effectiveness over time and might lead to aggressive behavior in the child. Here we discussed two ways to change your child’s behavior.  Punishment in the form of time-out and reinforcement in the form of rewards are more effective than physical punishment to stop an unexpected behavior and learn new behaviors. 

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